What a wonderful Suprise!

This sweet young couple just got engaged. Go to Renita's blog to see more wonderful pictures as he is proposing.

Snow, Cows, scenery and My best friend

Can't remember the name of this bird. It just sat there and let me take a million pics.


Even a freeze won't kill Ivy. UGH


Don't eat that. HAHA


Me. Don't I look good.


Pretty, Liked the way it looked


My Best Bud with silly string all over her.


Jacob showing me what the kids did to me.


Such pretty hair. I forgot I had it and the silly string in my hair and went to Dillons. Got some strange looks.


Jacob, Yvonne, Tanya with there Billy Bob teeth.


Meagan, my beautiful honarary niece.


My best bud Yvonne


Matthew, my handsome honarary nephew


Donkey, isn't he cute.


Trees, thought they looked cool all lined up that way


Really big Cow.

Would you change it if you could?

So the question is, If you could change the past would you?

Would you change the bad thing that happened to you? Would you change the past to make life easier? To make the evil go away?

What if you were molested in a horrible barn? Would you change it? At the time you take yourself away, it's how we survive the bad times. You throw it out of your mind afterwords. Until one day it crawls into your mind and throws your whole world out of whack.

At 9 you still have to make choices, right. Not to go into the barn when you have a bad feeling. If not me, maybe he would have gone after my little sister. Wasn't beyond his sick mind I'm sure.

So 32 years later it has crawled out again. I wish I could go back and change what happened. No, I guess I really wouldn't. I wouldn't be who I am without it.

I know now and then, if we are to be honest, he was evil. He was...... I feel sick and scared all over again.

So would you change the past? Consider if you did, what would happen. You would change more than that one event. You wouldn't be who you are. Maybe it would happen to someone else and totally destroy them.

Don't you think God knew what he was doing? Don't you think God was right there, holding you and crying with you. Don't you think that he had a plan for you?

Christmas Present... It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco.
The pastor of the church was looking over the cradle when he noticed that the baby Jesus was missing from among the figures.
Immediately he turned and went outside and saw a little boy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the infant, Jesus.
So he walked up to the boy and said,"well, where did you get him, my friend?" The boy replied "I got him from the church" "And why did you take him?"
The boy said, "well about a week before Christmas I prayed to the little Lord Jesus and I told him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas i would give him a ride around the block in it."

Pitty Party

Pitty Party here I come.

I have been going thru a rough patch this last week. I do this every so often. Nothing but a pitty party really. I just can't seem to shake it.

On Thursday we had a Christmas party at TOPS and low and behold we have a 2 week old baby there.

Eveywhere I turn there seems to be pregnant women. UGH!

As Jim was cleaning out the book shelf and rearranging stuff he came upon our Adoption book. All our papers, questionaires, books. OMW why didn't we throw those out? And why did he pick this day, this week to find them.

A sign from God telling me to get over it already? Or is he just trying to help? Either way my heart cracked open a little for what I can never have.

I envy those people who can have kids and treasure that gift and I detest those who can have them but shouldn't.

How wrong does that make me? Do you think God will forgive me for this?

Told you it was a pitty party.

I think I will go cry for awhile.

To those couples who are pregnant or already have children. Treasure them, love them and treat them with care. You don't know how lucky you are to have them.

Handwritten on the wall of Mother Teresa's Room

People are often unreasonable,illogical, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Be successful anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build it anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see in the final analysis, it is between you and God; It never was between you and them anyway.

-Kent Keith

Been awhile, nothing good.

I know you guys just sit on the edge of your seats just waiting for me to post. LOL
I have been a little busy and a little down.

My hubby was just officially diagnosed with Parkinson's last week. We went up to Ks City and met with DR. NO BED SIDE MANNER YOU ARE STUPID SO I MUST TALK DOWN TO YOU. UGH. (Thank you Thither and Steve for going with us).

Anywho I have been feeling sorry for myself because he is not able to work until he gets the balance thing fixed and I am the only one working. We lost our Ins. and his meds are pretty expensive.

I just can't get my mind gripped around this thing. I can't figure out how to work in another job on top of the one I have. Not in a small town anyway.

I am trying to plan for the future and the help he is going to need and can't do it.

It just makes me angry to be honest.

Anyway, Good news, I am now 100 + days smoke free.