Sunday, January 31, 2010

Would you change it if you could?

So the question is, If you could change the past would you?

Would you change the bad thing that happened to you? Would you change the past to make life easier? To make the evil go away?

What if you were molested in a horrible barn? Would you change it? At the time you take yourself away, it's how we survive the bad times. You throw it out of your mind afterwords. Until one day it crawls into your mind and throws your whole world out of whack.

At 9 you still have to make choices, right. Not to go into the barn when you have a bad feeling. If not me, maybe he would have gone after my little sister. Wasn't beyond his sick mind I'm sure.

So 32 years later it has crawled out again. I wish I could go back and change what happened. No, I guess I really wouldn't. I wouldn't be who I am without it.

I know now and then, if we are to be honest, he was evil. He was...... I feel sick and scared all over again.

So would you change the past? Consider if you did, what would happen. You would change more than that one event. You wouldn't be who you are. Maybe it would happen to someone else and totally destroy them.

Don't you think God knew what he was doing? Don't you think God was right there, holding you and crying with you. Don't you think that he had a plan for you?